with much love

On the physical plane if you walk into a dark room in the middle of the night with just one candle burning your eyes will be drawn to the flame. In fact you can't focus on anything else. On the other hand if you walk into a room full of light, something black is practically invisible. Theatrical people and magicians use this phenomenon all the time. On the spiritual and emotional level it is exactly the opposite. In the places of light in someone else it is so easy to see a spot of shadow material and it is extremely hard not to focus on it. On the other hand in the places that are in the deepest shadow it is almost impossible to see anything of the light.

In one way or another, spiritual people are instructed to answer that of God in each other. We are called to see the spark not only when its readily apparent but in the bad places and also see the light that surrounds the soul even though there is a spot of imperfection. This does not mean that we ignore or collude with each other's wickedness. Rather, keeping mindful of the inner light, we can help each other come to terms with these parts of ourselves and keep ourselves open as others labor with us.

The only way we can be truly illuminated in this is with love and without ego. As soon as we are doing the work out of a belief that we are more righteous or to prove ourselves or to protect ourselves or the status quo against change, we are lost. The motivation, the cause for this work, must be only love and the desired effect must likewise be simply love: a deep caring for one another. Struggle is a wonderful opportunity to realize our highest potential. We reconnect with that universal source of peace, wholeness, love and light.

This is all well and good to say but how can this be accomplished especially in the face of large and often emotional upheavals. As spiritual beings we have several powerful tools at our disposal. We can know that G-d is always with us and we will be accepted if we join with and dedicate ourselves with this force. This source of goodness was with the biblical Jacob and his sons after they did truly despicable, sacrilegious things yet it is explicitly clear that God was still with them. Just so, this Presence is always with us as well. From Genesis (35:1) "God said to Jacob" (God is with us). It then lays out instructions for how to make spiritual amends:
1. go to the place of God and stay there, honor the holiness
2. rid yourself of alien ideas, everything that keeps us from holiness
3. purify and recommit ourselves
4. turn ourselves around (changing clothes).
Once we take those steps the covenant is renewed even stronger than before (35:9).

It is during our most troubled times that faith and our lives as holy people is tested. During these times we can moan and groan about this awful burden, we can focus on the trauma and personalize it, "so and so did such and such.." or we can seize the future and make the most of our lives. Jacob sends his favorite son Joseph to check up on his brothers who sell him into slavery. Joseph could easily have sunk into a "poor me", "evil brothers" emotional state but instead he looks forward and makes the most out of his life and surroundings. In the end he saves all his family and people. He is G-d's solution. This can be our choice as well.

For my part I can try to keep what I put out into the world and interpersonal interactions positive, loving and spiritual centered. All I (and maybe any of us) can do is be and behave in a good, faithful way, moving forward to the best of our ability with beauty, love and peace ("walking cheerfully over the earth answering that of God in everyone") and leave the final outcome to God.

Purpose

What is the purpose to our lives? Sometimes its easier to see a purpose when looking backwards. Is there a pattern? Are we retreading the paths we have walked before with little improvement? Maybe ultimately there is a purpose to everything in that there are always opportunities to learn lessons if we just open our eyes; opportunities to make decisions that allow us to gain wisdom and positively impact the world.

When or if we reach the threshold to whatever our concept of that perfect place beyond the material world, we can look back and maybe it seems as a prelude to something; for me a jumping off into the sea of goodness, rational thinking, sparkilyness of light and love. Then all the past can have a higher spiritual purpose even family discord, hard though that is to imagine. If it wasn't for intense sibling rivalry both between sisters ( Leah and Rachel) as well as brothers (Jacob and Esau), there would be no 12 tribes of Israel, no Jewish people (at least not as today).

Whoever we are, at times we can even find purpose and a blessing in the most challenging parts of life. In those times of isolation, shame, of feeling unworthy or longing for softness rather then a pillow of stone maybe our only choice is to look up. There, after the struggle we can see ourselves with all our flaws but with the readiness to change. Our lives reveal and revel in a higher purpose, a life of service to something far greater than ourselves. Do we have anything better to do?